Thursday, August 20, 2015

Swapping the Big Sea for the "Big C"

One of the hardest things to deal with when you get cancer isn't the disease itself. It's all the bi-products. It's loosing your freedom. Freedom to choose, freedom to be who you are and freedom to do what you want - when you want.

I am the epitome of a free spirit. My life choices have generally come from a sense of never wanting to conform to stereotypes and restrictions and one of my biggest loves has always been and always will be the water and the ocean. For as long as i can remember, I have wanted to be in the sea, on the sea, under the sea, surrounded by the sea, live by the sea .... you get the gist!

I have engaged in as many activities as possible that ticks those boxes. Diving, waterskiing, windsurfing, stand up paddle boarding and my favourite of all - surfing. These have all been stolen from me for the time being. I moved to Brighton back in 2011 for this very reason and finally found the place I live now, which looks out to the sea and is less than 100 metres from front door to pebbles. Up until June, this was my utopia.


I couldn't have asked for more. I planned a summer of swimming, surfing and SUP. This has been reduced to a summer of watching others do the same and feeling beyond envious. It feels a bit like it has all been put there as a massive wind up!!


Luckily my little bundle of fluff has come to the rescue. My very own beach pup honey. She forces me to leave the safety and comfort of my sofa three or four times a day - and where do we go? The beach of course. I walk along as close to the surf as possible, breathing in the sea air, tasting the salt as I inhale. 

When the tide is out, I kick my flip flops off and feel the feel the soft sand between my toes. The best time of the day is first thing in the morning, when no one is around and i watch my crazy puppy charging around after the gulls and taking in the same sights, sounds and smells that I do. She is a true surf pup.

So for the time being, all I can do hope this all goes away as quickly as possible and carry on dreaming of the day I can grab my board and my wetsuit once again and be reunited with the love of my life!


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